Lent 2020 rolled around at the exact time I was leaving my job and I was seeking a deeper connection to my faith. I felt certain I was being called in a new direction, so I wouldn’t describe myself as “worried” (though that is my typical resting state), but I was restless and uncertain about where my life was headed. So Lent seemed perfectly timed for me to intentionally lean into that relationship.

Many people think of “giving something up” for Lent, since that is the most common way Christians recognize the season. (Well—if we’re honest the most common way most Christians recognize the season is to ignore it. But if you practice, you probably give something up, or at least intend to.) But the purpose is to make a sacrifice, something that strengthens your faith as you relate to the sacrifice of Jesus, and gives you the opportunity to increase your reliance on God to sustain you during that time. Common sacrifices involve food, such as fasting or giving up meat on certain days. For me, in addition to the spiritual benefits, I also appreciate the chance to strengthen my self-discipline, and think this is a great practice that anyone can benefit from, regardless of when or why you do it.

Because of the purpose of Lenten practices, for the last ten years or so I spend a fair amount of time determining what my action will be. Occasionally I have taken something on; more often I do give something up. I usually begin thinking of ideas a week or two in advance, most of which I think “okay, I could do that.” And then eventually I will come up with something where my reaction is, “every day for six weeks? No. I can’t do that.” And that’s the one I pick. Here are a few examples of past Lenten sacrifices:

• French fries (don’t judge)
• Diet Dr. Pepper (I said don’t judge!)
• Giving the best of what I have instead of the scraps (example: If I have a $1 or a $20 to tip the airport shuttle driver, give the $20)
• Adopt a new spiritual practice
• Give away something every day that I like and enjoy
• Wear a large, visible cross necklace (I worked in a pretty secular space at the time, so this was riskier than it may sound)
• Swearing (oof, that was a rough year)

This year, my spirit was very sore, and I felt a need to really lean into Lent. Plus, since I wasn’t working regularly, I knew I’d have the time to focus intently on this practice. I decided to fast on the first day of Lent (Ash Wednesday) and on Good Friday (a traditional fasting day); to read a daily Lenten devotional by one of my favorite spiritual leaders, Adam Hamilton, and to give up spending on myself.

As background: for the past few years, I have been an increasingly busy traveling professional with an increasing income to accompany it. My life was full of stress and I was constantly on-the-go and in front of people. Therefore, my approach had been to buy the conveniences I needed to manage that life, to be my best in front of others, and to spend money to ‘reward’ myself in moments of stress.

But as my job was coming to an end, I realized I couldn’t afford to keep doing that; and as I was examining my life’s alignment with my values, I knew this wasn’t the kind of person I wanted to be. I began feeling increasingly uncomfortable with what I spent on personal grooming or the number of beverages I was purchasing outside the home or all the Amazon packages that were too easy to one-click and ship for free. And when I thought of the idea, my first reaction was, “That’s impossible. How would I even do that?” Boom. Done.

Here are my rules:

• Clearly, I had to eat. So basic grocery supplies were allowed. But I timed this with a pantry challenge, so when I did my weekly meal planning, I started by trying to make meals out of the items we already had, and only went to the grocery store for needed items we didn’t have on hand.
• No eating out. The only exception was my son’s birthday party which we had already planned. Turns out, I gained an unfortunate assist on this one with the social distancing required by COVID-19.
• Household items were okay, as well, as long as they were completely necessary. When we ran out of Q-tips, I bought more. When the Anker charger I’d been eyeing went on sale, I passed it up.
• Of course, we paid our basic monthly bills: the mortgage, the cell phone bill, charitable giving (which we consider as much of an obligation as our other bills).
• During this time, we ended up planning a weekend trip to meet up with my in-laws in April. I decided it was okay to pay the deposit on the hotel since it wouldn’t technically be happening until after Lent was over.
• This was my challenge. So, except for the social pressure of me not eating out, my husband and son were not obligated to follow along. And gifts, such as a birthday present for my mom, were allowed, as well.

As I’m writing this post, we’re almost exactly halfway through the Lenten season. Parts of the challenge have been much easier than I thought; others have been really difficult, and I have slipped up a time or two. Once the season is over, I’ll share an update on how it went and what I learned in the process.

Do you have a Lenten practice you’re undertaking this year? Leave a note in the comments. I’m always looking for ideas for the future!